The Calm Before

Last weekend, S and the girls went off to a quiet town by the ocean, where she was able to walk on the beach, and relax in a pool, floating weightless, relieving the thirty-two weeks of pregnancy straining her back. I headed with the guys to Montreal (Say no more! Say no more!), where there was little discussion of S’s progress, or our plans for the birth, or life post-baby – we had more important things to talk about! It was a refreshing couple of days for us both, a break from the routine in the good company of close friends.

I felt a little bit of the blahs coming back, the soft pull of inertia in the face of what’s surely going to be a big season of movement. The last stretch is here: the final full month before my thesis is due, the baby comes, and S and I are adults only and not parents too. The to-do list stretches long, and there’s a lot of people to see and decisions to make.

And though the increasingly warm temperatures and clear skies are rekindling my excitement, I’m holding on to this bittersweet feeling and nurturing it just a little, appreciating the quiet of early spring, the cool, full nights of sleep, and the small comforts of a routine that’s largely in my control.

Being selfish while I still can.


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