Saturday morning was chilly and crisp, so we headed to Blue Sky for muffins. Along with half the borough! The place was more packed than I’ve ever seen it; the line snaked around in front of the counter. Next to where everyone waited, behind a wall of windows, bakers were pulling trays of fresh muffins out of the big stack ovens. The air steamed with the smell of fresh cake and coffee, morning breath and wool. As we came closer to the counter I checked out the bins of muffins. When I turned around my wife looked ill – pale, cheeks flushed, forehead sweaty.

“You ok?”

“I gotta sit down,” she said.

“Ok,” I said, putting my hand on her back. I figured she was tired of standing. “What can I get you?”

She swatted my hand away. “Whatever – I’ve really gotta sit!”

She ran off and found a seat near the front door, and by the time I came back with our breakfast she felt woozy, but ok.

S isn’t typically weak-headed, but blood pressure drops when you’re pregnant. Who knew? Her heart is not only beating faster to bring more blood to the fetus, but her body has produced more blood. (I wonder if the added blood production adds to her fatigue?) Not only is she sensitive to overheating, but when she stands up too fast she gets a head rush.

All these changes to her body are crazy! Sometimes I don’t know how — or if — there’s anything I can do to help. On Saturday I didn’t even realize how serious her wooziness was. I mean, I was hot in the space too. But her discomfort was different, more severe. I’m trying to make positive suggestions when she talks about uncomfortable changes, and just generally be an ear. The things I can do to help, like buying breakfast for us on Saturday while she sat down, seem relatively small, but I guess that’s the limit to my ability to help.

This is all good parenting training, right? Not always being able to help the people you care for. Just stepping back and doing what you can and trusting that things will work out right. It’s sometimes frustrating. I wish I could do more!

You can read more about blood pressure during pregnancy here.


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